The king of culinary on Netflix’s Queer Eye will bring celebrity guests on the show to help connect them with their rich heritages.
More Antoni Porowski on our screens? Yes, please.
National Geographic is launching a new documentary series, and foodie Antoni Porowski is hosting it. No Taste Like Home with Antoni will see Porowski on an epic journey “to discover the rich heritages of global celebrities by way of their ancestors’ food traditions, techniques and culinary experiences.”
Since 2018, the multifaceted Polish talent has been elevating at-home cooking for heroes on the popular Netflix series. But in this fresh endeavor, Porowski delves deeper into the profound link between people and food.
“Food is such an integral part of understanding who we are and where we come from,” said Porowski. “I am so grateful for this once-in-a-lifetime adventure, alongside some wonderful friends both new and old, traveling the globe, making up for all the times I skipped geography class in high school, to explore food traditions and cultures, and am honored to embark on this journey with National Geographic.”
While the celebrity guests joining Porowski on this expedition remain undisclosed, we know the cookbook author will venture through South Korea, Germany, Italy, Senegal, Malaysian Borneo, New York, and Texas.
Producing the series is Studio Ramsay Global, AKA Chef Gordon Ramsey’s production company. Ramsey described No Taste Like Home as “a fascinating, feel-good series that will beautifully thread together family food stories from past and present.
“I’m really thankful to our celebrities who came on this journey,” he continued. “Taking us to all corners of the globe, inviting us into their lives and trusting us to tell their family’s food stories in this way.”
Porowski will reveal the celebrities accompanying him on his social media in the lead-up to the series release. Stay tuned!
I was born in a small village in the middle of Ireland in the 90s. As you can imagine, I grew up in the shadow of the Catholic church. My relationship with the church and religion, in general, is complicated. Despite being so fundamental to the lives of so many of my loved ones, the church has hurt me in ways I can’t fully explain. Even now Catholic imagery and iconography, not unlike Leonardo da Vinci’s The Last Supper, sets off a fight-or-flight response in me.
I realize I’m not alone in this. All over the world, Christianity has left an incalculable impact on queer people. So much of the harm LGBTQIA+ folks face is done in the name of Christianity. Although there are examples of queer-friendly churches, this is by no means the default. Unsurprisingly queer people often have to fend for themselves and navigate their religious communities under the constant threat of ostracisation or violence. Carried on the back of colonialism, the church has left this deadly influence on communities previously accepting of LGBTQIA+ folks. So, where do we go from here?
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Enter Barry Brandon
There are queer folks out there prepared to look this problem in the eyes. To meet it with curiosity and creativity in the hopes of dismantling anti-LGBTQIA+ rhetoric, legal precedents, and social stigma. Folks like Barry Brandon. You may recognize Brandon from their viral appearances on queer TikTok, or perhaps from our coverage of their last project which celebrated queer beauty and strength. Now Brandon, better known as @thequeerindigo, has curated and produced a whole new project. The First Queer Supper is a queer take on The Last Supper, retold through a lens of unapologetic, highly visible, queer excellence. The images depict 13 beautiful queer humans from all over the world positioned at one side of a long table. 13 humans, representing Jesus, eleven Apostles, and Mary Magdalene.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
A Queer Take on The Last Supper
The timing of this project’s launch, on the eve of Good Friday, is no coincidence. “The First Queer Supper is intended to be both referential and disruptive,” says Brandon. “By depicting powerful queer humans in a canonical piece of Christian iconography, the workforces a duality that is both uncomfortable and comforting to the viewer.” The concept, by Barry Brandon and Sebastián Sommaruga, literally invites queer people to the table when it comes to depictions of religious imagery. The images, taken by Franco Dlp, also feature other members of The Queer Coven, including Rodrigo Falero, Chris, Charles, Sister Trish, Ovidiu Popescu, Rylé Tuvierra, Awad, Jamal, Ash, Nil Alguer, Arash, Jay Jay Revlon.
“The work calls attention to the heteronormative and harmful systems continuing to affect queer people,” says Brandon. “While also very explicitly undermining them.” I got the chance to connect with Brandon about this project, allowing me to explore the stunning imagery a little deeper. I also spoke to Brandon about her experiences with religion and how ze finds joy as a queer person today. Before diving in, follow Brandon and all the other lovely people who helped bring this iconic project to life.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Gayety: This project is sure to ruffle some feathers, especially given the timing of the release. What do you hope straight, cis folks will take away from this, if anything?
Barry: If the Jesus that Christians worship were alive today he would be the biggest socialist. He would be protesting in the streets to advocate for LGBTQIA+ rights. He would be a champion for queer and trans people and definitely wouldn’t be the kind of person the North American republican party would support. It is essential for queer people to find solace and value in themselves rather than seeking approval from outside people and institutions. It is my goal to build a stronger community and find actionable solutions. This will always be more effective than waiting for change—and infinitely more effective than “thoughts and prayers”
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Gayety: Tell us a little bit about your background or experience with Christianity, positive or negative.
Barry: I grew up with a Sicilian/Italian background, but oddly enough, my family was not religious. However, due to my heart condition — from what I have gathered — my mother turned to Christianity to seek some kind of calmness or purpose, rather than looking inward. She bounced around to different churches, i.e. episcopal, methodist, etc, and landed on the catholic church. I attended CCD and had my first communion, as well as my confirmation, but never felt aligned with what I was being taught. Constantly asking questions, I never received any answers that made sense.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
I stepped massively away from any alignment with the church when I was about 16. I remember feeling uncomfortable with the balance of power that the priest had over everyone, how he spoke (essentially commanding people), and everyone just listened. Even just the ritual of it — the constant standing up and sitting down, always felt emotionally heavy and confusing. Something about people giving away that much power to someone who was interpreting a fictitious book, as if it were fact, and determining what was “truth”. I was quite confused.
I am not traumatised by the church myself, but I am quite cautious of the power the church holds. Especially their ability to spin the teachings of Jesus, who they hold at the center of their religion, from the kind, loving, generous, giving, selfless, inclusive socialist (essentially the ultimate progressive) — into a figure that is somehow aligned with a “conservative” viewpoint is both harmful and asinine.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Gayety: So many queer folks of all ages are just now beginning to unpack the religious trauma they faced growing up. What advice would you to them?
Barry: We as humans are oftentimes intuitively aware of certain things without knowing why. We have that gut feeling, in our stomach, that acts as a sixth sense. I believe everyone has this ability of intuition—it only depends on strength. I believe that generational trauma and lies have a sort of weakening effect on this ability. Often these lies may not be deliberate, yet are passed-down responses to trauma to remain safe. For example, “we do this because it’s tradition”—even though that tradition hasn’t been questioned in a long time, maybe ever, and just becomes “it is what it is”.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
The perpetual, somewhat unconscious cycle, of indoctrinating people into religious behaviors and worldviews is one of, if not the, scariest things to me. It terrifies me how often people who are parents decide to bring a human into the world against their will, then are permitted to instill and indoctrinate those humans with their beliefs (based on nothing other than traditions), to create humans that have no autonomy, or ability to determine fact from fiction for themselves. Then, if said human rejects these teachings in any way—it can lead to extremely deep-rooted trauma that can take years to heal from if said human ever heals at all.
Let Intuition Be Your Compass
My advice to people is that seeking external validation is never the answer. Your intuition can be your compass. You don’t need a rulebook to life. Take the time to heal. Speak directly into the mirror, and tell yourself that you were lied to about many things. Forgive yourself for not understanding those lies sooner. Take the time to heal from that truth, and build yourself up from a space of self-love and acceptance. Your intuition, if it wasn’t there already, will more than likely become much more present. Find self-love. Find community. It is here that you will find so much joy.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Gayety: How do you think this project, or projects like it, might help queer folks reconcile their faith and their sexuality?
Barry: I would prefer to leave that question for the viewer.
Gayety: The project is truly a feast of the eyes. Tell us about your favorite piece of imagery from the shoot and its significance.
Barry: For me, it was the humans involved. Of the 13 humans featured there is representation from 11 countries. And of course all of the hidden items. It’s like where’s Waldo…can you spot the hidden gems?
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Gayety: So much harm is being done right now to queer people in the United States in the name of Christianity. What are you doing to find joy as a queer person right now?
Barry: As a quite joyous person I find joy everywhere, It’s the little things—get-togethers with friends, park days, beach days, artistic collaborations, movie nights, travels, all of it.
Gayety: After the Pearls shoot, and now this, we are dying to know what’s next, and how folks can support your work.
Barry: After a 4-year hiatus away from nightlife, I am returning. I will be throwing, what will be, a monthly event in Barcelona at Razzmatazz and I am so excited about it! I can’t give away too much just yet but be on the lookout very soon. It will be a queer-centered experience with lewks, performances and so much more.
Instagram @thequeerindigo
Good Fridays
To observe Good Friday in Ireland people often went without meat. An old family friend of ours (and staunch Catholic) used to tell my mother that “It’s a good Friday you have meat to eat.” I know it’s possible to keep religion, even Catholicism, without queerphobia. It’s possible to be Christian and to put the needs of others, especially the vulnerable and the marginalized, before your own. I know it because I’ve seen it. My life is dotted with folks who keep their religion, and their promise to uphold human dignity and agency. Why then does it feel so rare?
Projects like The First Queer Supper remind me that faith, real faith, can and should be challenged. All of us, no matter what we believe, should ask ourselves who we’re welcoming to our table and who we’re turning away. In the end, queer people will always find community—even if we have to build our own table.
Before You Leave
If you haven’t yet, please take a moment to follow the incredibly talented folks who worked on this project. Check out Barry Brandon’s website and follow them on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook. Keep reading for a list of the creatives behind the camera and show them your support.
Homosexuality has been documented for thousands of years in many different cultures and societies worldwide. Likely, homosexuality has always existed in some form, although how others perceive and act on it varies greatly. (more…)
As you enter the new year, you may look to the sky for guidance. By this, we mean looking at your daily horoscope alerts to gauge if you are on the right path. If this is you, don’t worry, you’re not alone. I constantly check my Co-Star alerts to see what the universe has in store for me this week. It’s always fun to read more about your zodiac and in the process, discover new things about yourself.
But one thing your daily horoscope is likely not telling you is what queer celebrity shares your zodiac. That is a bit niche for your average zodiac app. But we were curious. From independent Aquarians to dramatic Leos, would I have much in common with a celebrity who shares my sign? The phrase goes, “They’re just like us,” right? So let’s put it to the test. Scroll through this gallery to read more about yourself and discover which queer celeb shares your Astrology sign.
Like Scream star Jasmin Savoy Brown, you are bold and ambitious. Your fiery energy is contagious, and you’re never afraid to step up to a challenge or embark on a new journey. Though you can be angered easily, you’re just as quick to laugh it off and move on. Life is short, after all.
Credit: Instagram/@Jasminsavoy
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
Megan Fox
Tauruses enjoy the finer things in life. Like our bisexual icon Megan Fox, you find yourself drawn to beauty and pleasure and value touch and taste above all other senses. You are also an extremely hard worker who strives for the very best. This also carries over into their romantic endeavors. You seek meaningful connections, not fleeting passion.
Credit: Instagram/@meganfox
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
Laverne Cox
Like Orange is the New Black star Laverne Cox, you are constantly curious. You are a trailblazer who leads with your mind and not your emotions. Cox is also a public leader who works tirelessly to bring equal rights to the trans community. You too find that there is always something new to learn about and master and use your expert communications skills to help share your discoveries with the world.
Credit: Instagram/@lavernecox
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Alexandra Shipp
As a cancer, you lead with your heart. You’re not afraid to stand up for what you believe in, even if you hide your true emotions beneath a sometimes cold exterior. Like Shipp, you value your family and friends greatly and cherish the time you spend with your loved ones.
Credit: Instagram/@alexandrashipppp
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
Cara Delevingne
As a Leo, you are extremely creative and dramatic. You enjoy being the center of attention and are a natural born leader. Leos are also known to be charming, warm, welcoming, funny, and protective. Model and actress Cara Delevingne is one example of a proud Leo in Hollywood.
Credit: Instagram/@caradelevingne
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
Lili Reinhart
Virgos are powerful problem solvers. You value organization and productivity and are always willing to lend a hand to those who need it. Like Riverdale actress Lili Reinhart, you have a sharp mind and make a great companion.
Credit: Instagram/@lilireinhart
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
Halsey
As a Libra, you value peace and balance above all else. You’re a hopeless romantic and often seek companionship because you loathe being alone. You avoid conflict and are often referred to as the “peacekeeper” of your friend group. Like Halsey, you are extremely generous and kind.
Credit: Instagram/@iamhalsey
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
Amandla Stenberg
Scorpios are known for being deeply emotional, stubborn, and strong. Some might mistake your passion for intensity, but you just have a lot of dominating feelings and emotions swirling around inside you. Like actor Amandla Stenberg, you are a loyal companion and will never turn your back on those you love and believe in.
Credit: Instagram/@amandlastenberg
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Barbie Ferreira
You are notorious for being impulsive. You find you can’t stay in one place without getting restless and are always seeking out adventure and exploration in everything you do. Like former Euphoria actress Barbie Ferreira, you are loved for your firecracker personality and your devotion to being transparent.
Credit: Instagram/@barbieferreira
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Reneé Rapp
You are ambitious, patient and kind. You go through life working to build a solid foundation for yourself and always seek to make the most out of every situation. Capricorns tend to make success look effortless but hide their true feelings under their strong work ethic. Similar to another powerful Capricorn (actress and singer Reneé Rapp) you’re also funny AF.
Credit: Instagram/@Reneerapp
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Stephanie Beatriz
Independent, spiritual and progressive, Aquarians know what they want out of life. You are social but never force yourself to be in situations that don’t resonate with you. Like Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Encanto actress Stephanie Beatriz, you are open to exploration and are eager to expand your mind. Your creativity and unique traits help you to stand out, but other signs may find you stubborn and close-minded.
Credit: Instagram/@stephaniebeatriz
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)
Rebel Wilson
Like Pitch Perfect star Rebel Wilson, you are a dreamer. Pisces people are sensitive, sympathetic, and emotionally aware. You often put others’s needs before your own and seek deep connections in your life. You may let your imagination run wild sometimes, but your friends are there to help keep you grounded.
Picture this. You live in the U.K., and your boss just fired you because you’re gay. Fortunately, the Equality Act 2010 makes this action unlawful and you have the right to challenge it. The Equality Act 2010 protects you from harassment, victimization, and discrimination, either direct or indirect. This protection is based on nine characteristics, including age, race, disability, religion, and sexual orientation. There’s a caveat to that last one, however. That’s because the Equality Act 2010does not protect you if you’re asexual.
Unfortunately, that’s only the beginning when it comes to asexual discrimination in the U.K. and worldwide. According to a ground-breaking report released by market research firm Ipsos in 2022, the asexual population in the UK has increased to 2%. That means over 130,000 individuals may identify as asexual in the U.K. If you’re reading from the U.S., that’s more than the population of Topeka, Kansas. How is it that such a significant number of people can be left so vulnerable to discrimination? And is there anyone out there trying to change that?
As Ace Week 2022 came to a close, I sat down with model, asexual activist, writer, and researcher Yasmin Benoit. I have had the pleasure to work with many activists in my years in queer media. Nonetheless, I was positively giddy at the prospect of finally chatting with Yasmin face-to-face. Her tenacity never fails to amaze me. Despite many obstacles, Yasmin faces every challenge with a kind of positive and proactive attitude that ignites change. As I see it, her forward momentum is the blueprint for asexual activism online. She’s also a diehard metal fan who made a name for herself as an alternative model. As someone who also grew up listening to bands like System Of A Down, I feel a distinct kinship.
Yasmin also has a long list of accomplishments under her studded belt. Most recently she launched the first asexual rights initiative in the U.K. in partnership with Stonewall. Her work as an activist includes creating and launching the #ThisIsWhatAsexualLooksLike movement, co-launching the first-ever International Asexuality Day (April 6th), and becoming the first asexual person to win the Attitude Magazine Pride Award. Her work has been published in The Huffington Post, Gay Times, Ann Summers, GQ, and many others. She regularly uplifts asexual and aromantic folks online and combats acephobia and anti-Blackness in one fell swoop. All of this, as Yasmin puts it, happened by accident.
Leading The Charge
“It was pretty accidental,” says Yasmin. Because she was working as a model, Yasmin found herself online more and more. There she noticed a distinct lack of direction in asexual activism. “I didn’t really feel like there had been a lot of progress in terms of where asexual activism was at,” says Yasmin. “I felt like I couldn’t complain about a lack of Black asexual representation if I was actively not doing anything about it.” Yasmin began to casually talk about asexuality online, and it quickly snowballed from there. All of a sudden the Reading-born metalhead found herself at the center of a growing movement. One that she would impact greatly.
Although her modeling career was, in some ways, a stepping stone to her activism, Yasmin never saw any overlap between these two parts of herself. For others, the context of her lingerie modeling and her asexual identity raises eyebrows. “I think it’s just when the images go out into the world, it influences how they’re perceived if you kind of know something about who the image is of,” says Yasmin. Although the content would be the same, regardless of whether Yasmin was asexual or not, the content can take on a new meaning for the observer.
Yasmin explains that her modeling content is just an avenue of self-expression and not necessarily an attempt to break stereotypes. And yet, her work as a model does challenge all-too-common beliefs held by allosexual folks in the mainstream. It seems that Yasmin simply could not escape advocacy work, even if she wanted to.
Bringing a Community Together
To be clear, she doesn’t seem to want to. And why would she? Yasmin says that, in a way, she created her community almost in service to herself. “I also wasn’t seeing what asexual people really looked like,” says Yasmin. “So much of our interaction happens online […] You see a lot of avatars and emojis and just like, blocks of text”. Yasmin says she wasn’t seeing the faces in her community very much. When she did see them, they were mostly white teens in the U.S., which speaks more to access than it does actual asexual identity. “It’s not really representing the diversity of our community,” says Yasmin. “And it’s not like the media’s going to catch up to that any time soon.”
This Is What Asexual Looks Like
Creating this community gave Yasmin a place to get to know her community on their terms. People from all over the world, from her backyard to India. These are important moves for a community shrouded with so many misconceptions and stereotypes.
The reality is that asexual folks can look like anyone. They come from all cultures, genders, and ages. “We actually have one of the more diverse age ranges,” says Yasmin. According to the same Ipsos report, 2% of millennials and 2% of Gen X identify as asexual. Although the term is gaining in popularity, it’s important to remember that asexual folks have always existed. “Our society hasn’t started placing such importance on labeling every single non-heteronormative orientation until more recently,” says Yasmin. Asexuality is a natural variation in human sexuality that existed long before the label came to be.
Another common misconception found, even within the queer community, is that asexual folks are inherently “anti-sex” or in some way sex-negative. “Not experiencing sexual attraction doesn’t mean you’re against sexual attraction,” says Yasmin. These kinds of ideas can sometimes be rooted in the misguided belief that asexuality is a “lifestyle choice.” Ironically this is a weapon often used to hurt other members of the queer community, and yet we are sometimes all too quick to wield it.
The Ace Project
So, where do we go from here? According to Yasmin, the answer is legislation. “Awareness is helpful, but when you talk about representation that’s not just a side character on a TV show,” says Yasmin. “You’re gonna need legislative representation […] Actual fundamental things that are going to permanently impact our lives.”
This is no small task. As big as it turns out the ace community is, they are going to need allies to make this kind of change viable. This is where Stonewall, the largest LGBTQIA+ rights organization in Europe, comes in. Yasmin saw the kind of change they were capable of effecting and reached out to them herself. When she learned that they had no ongoing plans to research and report on asexual inequalities, she took the initiative. “I kind of talked them into it,” says Yasmin. She made her case to the team and they let her run with the project. As someone with an Undergrad in Sociology and a Masters’s in crime science, it’s not hard to see why they trusted Yasmin with leading this research.
“We’re going to be releasing a report into asexual discrimination in the U.K.,” says Yasmin. “Specifically in terms of the workplace, healthcare, and education”. The Equality Act 2010 protects marginalized groups in these areas. What they need is data. Conversations online can be healing, cathartic, and helpful to community members, but legislative change requires documentation.
The Time Is Now
The report is underway, but what we can say is asexual folks right now are vulnerable. They are unprotected in the same spaces their queer peers are protected and they often don’t have our support. Asexuality is also still a pathologized orientation, meaning they are especially vulnerable in the healthcare system. Homosexuality was included in the United States DSM until 1973 and the U.K. ICD until 1990. To this day hypoactive sexual desire disorder—pretty much the definition of asexuality—is in both. Although the DSM does have a small qualifier that makes an exception if the patient identifies as asexual, that highly relies on the current information available to both the provider and their patient. All of this has a very real impact.
According to the National LGBT survey in 2018, ace folks are 10% more likely to be offered or undergo conversion therapy compared to other orientations. It so happens that the U.K. government appears to be dragging its feet when it comes to banning conversion therapy. Even if they did ban conversion therapy it’s possible they wouldn’t include asexuality. “Even though we’re more likely to experience it,” says Yasmin. We know change is possible, although it is also rare. New York is currently the only place that mentions asexuality in its sexual orientation non-discrimination act.
How Can You Help?
Lucky for you, your job is easy. “Amplify it,” says Yasmin. “If you see it, share it.” When this report comes to light it’s important that people have the vocabulary and empathy to understand it. Share resources and knowledge online. Follow asexual activists and educators online to equip yourself with the tools you need to talk about asexuality confidently. Use that confidence to engage in thoughtful conversations about asexuality with your peers and family members.
It’s our job to extend the sphere of influence for asexual folks far beyond that 5%. It’s our job to rally allies to support Yasmin’s work and research. If you’ve made it this far, follow her on Instagram and Twitter to keep up with the latest news. Listen to a song by Slaughter to Prevail as you write to your representative about sexual rights in your area.
Oh, and don’t forget to tell Yasmin that you appreciate her. I know I certainly do.
Chances are you’ve heard (and used) the term “yas queen” before. It’s plastered all over the internet in tweets and memes, and it’s bound to come up at a fierce drag show or a fun kiki with friends.
But what does “yas queen” mean? Where did the phrase come from? And how did it become so popular in the last few years?
“Yas queen” is a versatile term that’s often used as an exaltation or an expression of excitement. It’s similar to other queer slang terms like “work” and “fierce” and has the same connotation as saying something’s “giving you life”.
When you say “yas queen”, you can either be affirming someone, building them up, or celebrating an achievement. In other words, it’s like an ultra-fabulous high five!
For example, if a drag queen busts out a shablam, you can cheer them on with a hearty “yas queen”. Or, if a friend walks in with a killer pair of boots they’ve been dying to get their hands on, you could congratulate them with a “yas queen!”
Online, people either write it as “yas queen” or “yas kween”. There isn’t much of a difference between the two spellings, so don’t worry too much about it.
The origin of “yas queen” can be traced back to 1980s ball culture. In New York City, drag balls became a haven for young, queer people of color to express themselves and live their truths. At drag balls, attendees would strut their stuff and feel their fiercest fantasies for the adulation of their peers and a chance at a cash prize.
This underground subculture is where much of the queer slang we know today was cultivated. One of the first recorded utterances of the phrase “yas queen” can be heard in the 1990 documentary Paris is Burning, which gives an intimate glimpse into the phenomenon of ball culture in the 80s.
In the context of drag balls, “yas” was an exaltation, a cheer, a celebration of whatever the person on the runway was serving – confidence, fashion, face, power, fierceness. As discussed in a 2016 Reply All podcast episode, “‘Yas’ is there in the opening scene. This beautiful, golden drag queen struts out in front of an adoring crowd and they’re yelling it.”
“Queen”, on the other hand, is a reclaimed term, much like the word “queer”. Once used as a slur against effeminate men, “queen” is now used as a term of endearment or a way to revere someone deserving of praise and respect. Of course, it’s also used to describe someone who participates in drag culture, as in a “drag queen”.
How “Yas Queen” Became Mainstream
Despite being around since the 80s, “yas queen” remained largely a queer expression up until the 2010s. What changed? RuPaul’s Drag Race came into the picture. As the show became more and more successful, evolving from a niche little reality show into a mainstream hit, drag culture and the slang associated with it became more popular as well.
Then, in 2013, a user named Johnny Versayce inadvertently created the first “yas queen” meme by uploading a video of themselves going gaga over Lady Gaga. Versayce’s “YAS GAGA SLAY MAMA” video went viral, and “yas” was stamped into the internet lexicon forever.
And then came Broad City, the web series-turned-Comedy-Central-sitcom that peppered “yas” and “yas queen” into virtually every episode. One viral clip from the series shows the lead Ilana teaching her best friend Abbi how to say “yas queen” over and over again.
Does Using The Term Count As Cultural Appropriation?
There isn’t a consensus on whether non-queer people using queer slang terms like “yas”, “work”, and “fierce” counts as cultural appropriation. This is especially true as queer culture becomes more integrated into the mainstream through TV shows, films, and the internet. Some believe that it’s okay to use these terms as long as you know (and show appreciation for) where they came from or why they were created in the first place.
That said, it’s important to remember that queer slang terms were created by and for the community. “It was kind of like code. We were speaking code. For no one else to understand us,” says dancer Jose Xtravaganza in the aforementioned Reply All episode. “For just us, you know? It was our code against society.”
The Bottom Line
The ballroom scene (and the culture that was cultivated in it) was a haven when it was created. LGBTQ+ BIPOCs faced immense racism, homophobia, transphobia, homelessness, poverty, and discrimination due to living with AIDS and HIV. It was a place where people could thrive and celebrate each other despite everything going on around them.
Make sure to remember that the next time you let out a “yas queen!”
SOGIE is an acronym that means sexual orientation, gender identity, and expression. These are three things that may be intimately intertwined with one another. They certainly are not the same thing—and, most importantly, everyone has one! Let’s take a closer look at each of these terms.
SOGIE stands for sexual orientation, gender identity, and expression. SOGIE is often used in conversations surrounding LGBTQ issues, but it’s not limited to this community – everyone has SOGIE!
Let’s break each of these terms down.
Sexual Orientation
Sexual orientation refers to one’s sexuality, orientation, and attraction (or lack thereof). Terms such as lesbian, gay, and bisexual fall under this umbrella. That’s because they talk about who a person is attracted to. Heterosexual or straight also falls under this umbrella. These terms simply mean being attracted to people of a different gender.
While “sexual” is in its name, sexual orientation, in its broadest sense, also covers romantic and emotional attraction. For example, an asexual person may not experience sexual attraction. They may still experience romantic attraction and still be interested in relationships with other people. Terms such as heteroromantic, homoromantic, and biromantic fall under this umbrella.
Gender Identity
The next SOGIE meaning we’ll look into is gender as identity. Identity is personal and determined solely by the person identifying themselves. The Human Rights Campaign (HRC) describes gender identity as “one’s innermost concept of self as male, female, a blend of both or neither – how individuals perceive themselves and what they call themselves”.
A very important distinction has to be made between gender and sex. One’s sex is biological and often assigned or given at birth based on external, observable anatomy – this can be male, female, or intersex. Meanwhile, one’s gender might not necessarily match one’s sex. For example, transgender people identify differently from their assigned sex at birth, while cisgender people identify with their assigned sex.
Gender Expression
Gender expression refers to how “a person publicly expresses or presents their gender”. It can include clothing, behavior, interests, and general appearance.
While gender expression is certainly closely tied with gender identity, it’s important to remember that it is also very personal – it is the person’s choice on how they express themselves. One’s gender expression doesn’t have to match society’s ideas of what certain gender identities look like.
He, She, They: All About Pronouns
One important way that people may choose to identify themselves is through pronouns. A person’s pronouns may or may not seem to “align” with their outward gender expression, especially if the person’s expression doesn’t necessarily align with feminine, masculine, or even androgynous social norms, but they are an important part of their gender expression and identity.
The most commonly used pronouns include “she/her” and “he/him”. These are traditional “female or male” pronouns, but not everyone who is comfortable using these pronouns necessarily identifies with a binary or traditional gender. For example, just because a person uses “she/her” pronouns does mean she automatically identifies as “female”.
Since gender pronouns are very closely tied to social feminine and masculine norms, some people use neutral pronouns, such as the singular “they/them”. While “they/them” is often used for groups of people, it is perfectly valid and grammatically correct (not that it matters) to use them for individual people. Others use neo pronouns such as “ze/hir” which are meant to replace traditional pronouns.
Using these pronouns may allow a person to feel more secure in their identity as it lets them break away from traditional gender stereotypes associated with traditional pronouns.
What Does Being Queer Mean?
Queer is a SOGIE term that can describe any non-cis heterosexual person’s sexual orientation or identity. For example, a queer person may be attracted only to people of the same gender and identify as cisgender or be attracted to all genders and identify as non-binary.
Sadly, queer has been used as a slur against LGBTQ people in the past, so some people in the community are not comfortable using the word to describe themselves. Still, many are choosing to reclaim the word and proudly label themselves as queer. It’s best to ask a person how they identify themselves before referring to them as queer.
The Importance Of SOGIE
SOGIE is an integral part of a person’s identity, whether one is queer, straight, or cisgender. However, it’s particularly important for people who don’t identify as straight or cisgender as it gives them the language to express their gender and sexuality in a more nuanced and authentic way.
Many countries now recognize SOGIE attributes as protected in their anti-discrimination laws, making sure that queer people are not discriminated against or forced to fit social norms. Sadly, there are still countries that do not – the Philippines, for one, still has its SOGIE bill languishing in legal limbo.
SOGIE Is For Everyone
While SOGIE seems to be nearly synonymous with LGBTQ issues, it’s important to remember that everyone has SOGIE. Understanding even the very basics of SOGIE can help everyone create a safer and more open environment for everyone, whether they’re lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, or somewhere else on the LGBTQ spectrum.
“Gaydar”, “gay face”, the “gay ear”. These are terms that speak to a seemingly universal assumption—that it’s possible to determine someone’s sexuality based on their appearance alone. But is it really all that simple? Can people with a “strong gaydar” really sense whether someone is gay just by looking at them? Do some people really have an unmistakable “gay face” that easily gives away their sexuality? Is it really possible to tell if someone is gay?
Can You Tell If Someone Is Gay Just By Their Appearance?
The short answer? No. You can assume someone’s sexuality based on certain stereotypes, but there is no surefire way to “clock” someone without actually getting confirmation from that person. A lot of people think that you can easily spot a gay person by looking for certain signs. An effeminate man who’s into fashion, makeup, and RuPaul’s Drag Race may seem like an obvious candidate. But these are just stereotypes of what a gay person might like, and they’re deeply rooted in homophobia and, to a certain extent, misogyny.
What Makes A Man?
Let’s face it, we live in a deeply heteronormative society. What this means is that we’re conditioned—be it by our families, schools, religion, authority figures, or the media—to believe that being cisgender and heterosexual is the default and “normal” modes of gender and sexuality. And with this belief comes assumptions about what it means to be cis and straight. For men, it means being masculine, assertive, dominant, and unemotional. It means being into traditionally “manly” hobbies like extreme sports, fishing, cars, and hunting. It means not being too flashy in terms of your personal style, and not being into “feminine” clothing like short shorts or tight-fitting jeans, or flowy tops.
When someone goes against the grain and looks, acts, or participates in things that are deemed “feminine”, people then tend to assume that that person is not a “real man”. In short, if they’re not into traditionally masculine things, then they must be gay, right?
Not quite. After all, there are plenty of gay men who are buff, into working out, present more masculine and don’t typically enjoy more “feminine” hobbies. There are also plenty of lesbians and bisexual women who don’t look or act “butch” and prefer wearing dresses and skirts, wear makeup, and have never picked up a drill in their lives.
The best way to dispel the myth that you can easily tell if someone’s gay is by understanding the difference between sexual orientation, gender identity, and expression or SOGIE. These are all independent aspects of one’s personal identity.
Sexual Orientation
This is who you’re sexually (and/or romantically) attracted to. Homosexual (gay and lesbian) people are attracted to people of the same gender. Heterosexual (straight) people are attracted to people of a different gender. Typically this includes men who are attracted to women and women who are attracted to men. Bisexual and pansexual people are attracted to people of the same and different genders.
Gender Identity
This is your personal conception of your own gender. In other words, this is defined by whether you identify as a man, woman, or both/neither. Those who identify as the latter may be considered non-binary, agender, or genderfluid.
Doctors, family, and society, sometimes unwittingly assign people a certain gender at birth. Some of those people will grow up realizing that they don’t identify with that gender. That makes them transgender.
Gender Expression
Your gender expression is how you express or present your gender to the outside world. This includes your behavior, mannerisms, speech, clothing, and hair.
But remember: a person’s gender identity and expression are fundamentally different from their sexual orientation. In other words, who you find attractive has no bearing on your gender identity or how you wish to express that identity.
As such, this makes the idea of “being able to tell whether someone is gay” based on their outward appearance, body language, hobbies, and interests moot.
How Do You Know If Someone Is Gay, Then?
The only surefire ways to know if someone is gay are actually quite straightforward.
1. They Openly Identify As Gay
If a person says they identify as gay, chances are, they’re gay. Only an individual can discern what their sexual identity is. It has nothing to do with how they dress, talk, express themselves, or what interests they happen to have.
2. They Are In A Same-Sex Relationship
Homosexuality is a sexual orientation—pure and simple. No types of clothing, manners of speaking, or hobbies inherently link to a sexual preference. Society’s assumptions, culture, or even just anecdotal experiences usually inform these associations with sexuality. If someone is clearly in a same-sex relationship that is sexual, romantic or both, then they are likely not heterosexual. However, it doesn’t necessarily mean they are homosexual – they could be bisexual, pansexual, or any number of other orientations.
Shutterstock
Final Thoughts
The societal expectations surrounding gender roles and sexual preference simply amount to assumptions influenced by stereotypes. There are certainly some cultural norms that are more common in people who identify as gay, so some of these norms may feel like obvious signs that indicate someone’s sexuality. However, it’s not fair to make assumptions about anyone’s sexuality, and it’s always best to keep an open mind.
