Itβs hard out there for nice guys. Weβre desperatelyΒ searching for something weΒ can’tΒ find and are usually left in the dust. But what can we do to fix it?
Personally, Iβve learned the hard way. Love is something that cannot be shared lightly. As nice guys, our hearts are on display 24-hours a day, but the truth of the matter is the more free samples we give, the less we have for ourselves. Here are nine things you should stop doing, before itβs too late:
1. Playing homemaker too soon
When we like a guy, we instantly start daydreaming. Itβs fabulous. In our dreams, weβre the husbands with the kids, the house and all that comes with it. Usually, people who think this way end up focusing on creating the βimageβ rather than building a successful partnership. The last thing you want is to be Mr. Homemaker too soon. Trust me β you gotta batter, cook, then cool it, before you eat the cake.
2. Coming on too strong
Nice guys have a lot of feelings because we wear our hearts onΒ our sleeves. We canβt help ourselves. When we [think we] love someone, we have to let them know. We spurt it out because weβre impulsive creatures. We need to shout from the rooftops. An emotion like love cannot be held in very long.
The trouble with this is that weβre setting the bar tooΒ high. If we instantly jump that far, we have nowhere to journey towards. Itβs like belting a high money note at the beginning of a song. Why not tease us a little before going full throttle? Let the emotions settle a bit, that way you have room to grow.
3.Β Being too available
You need to let him work a little bit. Men are hunters. Imagine if our prey came directly to us, laid down and said, βOk. Iβm ready. Eat me.β Whatβs the fun in that? Allowing a man to hunt youΒ actually increases hisΒ loyalty, because it makes himΒ believe that you’reΒ worth the pay off. HeΒ earned your love.
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Do not be a βyesβ man. Itβs important to be there for him emotionally and physically, of course, but you should never let him think you are on call 24/7. Donβt be too easy to snatch. You have to let him chase you a little.
4. Over-complimenting
We want our crush to know what we think of him: βYouβre such a nice guy,β βYour hair is so nice,β βYou have such a nice smile,β βI canβt stop thinking about your laugh.β Donβt get me wrong, every man loves to be flattered, but over-complimenting is a major sign of insecurity.
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Be proud that you have him now. Complimenting him every five seconds isnβt going to guarantee his loyalty, nor will it increase his love for you. Tell him heβs beautiful, but donβt make him feel like youβre a teenage fan.